When Hawks Attack

I came home from work last week, The neighbour lady is on the front step to her house. She asks me to come and see if there is a dead bird in the backyard so I go and take a peek, but just before I get there, she says to me, it's her pet pigeon, I had seen this thing on the peak of her house and let me tell you, it was fat, I mean likely 5-7 pounds of bird there.

I knew she fed the animals and vermin on our street (squirrels, pigeons and the like), anyway, as I was making my way there she mentioned she thought the pigeon had been killed by a hawk she feeds...

So I got into the back yard, there on the ground was this damn pigeon, all round and still. Sitting on its corpse was the friggin hawk. I grabbed a rake that was leaned against the fence and made my way over to rescue the corpse of this magnificent bulbous vermin-fowl when all of the sudden, the great wings of the hawk spread and began to laboriously flap. It took about 5 seconds but the hawk managed to lift this fatass off the ground and started making a run for the fence beside me.

He got about 5 feet off the ground and barely pulled himself over the fence
The pigeon however gets knocked into the fence, thus stalling the momentum of the noble hawk, both of them kind of roll over the fence and fall into the neighbours’ yard, into safety (from me I guess).

I stood there among the 12 or so squirrels in this person’s backyard in utter disbelief.

Now, imagine the attack on animal kingdom;

Narrator: "The noble hawk descends on its prey swiftly...

The pigeon has no idea until the last second that he is to be his dinner…

The hawk screams eeeeeaaaaa...

The pigeon bellows rrrrooo!!!!

And it's over".

I recounted the story several times before realizing how funny it is. I will file it along with the ‘Bear and the Trout’ story from Lake Diefenbaker. And the ‘spokesperson for seatbelts when big brother is driving’ story (to be posted).