MRI day

I had both knees x-rayed and MRI’d today I get to go and “discuss” the results with my Doctor. Here’s a few glimpses on what she might tell me.

“Both knees are screwed, here’s a brochure on wheelchairs.”

“Both knees are dangerously close to becoming a chew toy for your pet, here’s a brochure.”

“Your knees are fine, the pain you are feeling is normal for a man your age, you may want to also start thinking about Viagra. Here’s a brochure.”

“Here’s a brochure to read while you turn and cough.”

“The cartilage in your knees has left you and is never coming back, accept it. Here’s a brochure on Accepting Abandonment.”

“Your knees are blown because you’re too fat, we’ve scheduled a physical, bring some running shoes. Here’s a flyer from Sport check.”

“Your left testicle has to be removed or you’ll die…. Oops wrong file! Wanna see?”

“You car is double parked and is being towed, but if I were you I wouldn’t run after them, those suckers could give out any minute.”

“Your knees are… whoa, what the hell happened to your hand?”

Either way I’m coming back with some reading material and maybe one less nut. My doctor is Newfie.