A whale sized pain in the @$$

Call it a summer vacation, call it a temporary lapse in intelligence. I personally would call it the sudden alignment of Family responsibility, extra curricular activities and the simultaneous break down of my dictation plank (keyboard)… I have been neglecting my brainchild, I apologize.

So now I need a new computer, any donations can be forwarded directly to me, otherwise please bare with me while I limp through getting whatever time I can to write a blurb.

So recently I went to Marine Land, it was a good experience… once… prices are ridiculous and there is really only one show worth the time it takes. The rides are for the strong stomached and fearless. Ellie Mae would roll her eyes and laugh at me.

One thing that I noticed was that the population of this park in Niagara Falls was less like a community and more of a crayon box of origins cultures and languages. I was the minority – but so was every one else. It was interesting to watch a pair on Mennonite ladies in full dress ripping along on the “Dragon” roller coaster at top speed. It was even funnier to see (or not see) a 40 pound 4 foot tall child on the same ride. Her head was barely visible.

Of course I have to mention Ontario driving abilities here. Barrelling down the 402, 401 and 403 sandwiched by the masses in anything from a BMW to a 1981 Topaz all going 145 kilometres per… lane changes catch you by surprise like the absence of that last step as you climb a set of stairs in the dark.

As I made my innocuous manoeuvres along the way it became obvious to me that no ride at marine land gets my stress levels and heart-rate up like a romp along the highway side by side with the ignorance that comes with a fast car, or a car that you simply don’t care about, or a car with “Dale Earnhardt Junior” decals all over it. Oddly enough it is the minivan that I fear most, because they have all the characteristics of a race car: The above mentioned decals, a large motor, and manoeuvrability (somewhat anyway). Most importantly the pilot of this road rocket is a middle aged man with children screaming in the back that has lost his will to live, thus the lack of self preservation instinct that most of us still cling to.

I finally arrived home, knuckles white and back aching head drowsy because of a 1 and ¾ hour detour into the worst traffic in the area (my fault… ahem). Man is it nice to be at work today, maybe later I will beat my head against a wall so that I may relive the entire Marine Land experience, and save 250 bucks.