Dear Mommy

Dear Mom,

Things are great here in Sarnia. The factories have been billowing out a lot more black stuff than usual, it's something to see, in fact on my way to the pharmacy to get the athsma medicine my doctor prescribed me, the moonlight was shining through it and kind of looked like the Northern lights from back home!

My apartment is great, I am finally settled in. It took me a while to figure out where to put things, since each time I would put them where I thought I wanted them they would slide across the place and end up piled at one end of the house where my bedroom is. It's a tough walk back up to the kitchen with the stove, but I figure once it's plugged in, it should stay close to the where I want it.

Jackal is adjusting well to the place, he's been trying to help me set up by pre-ripping my toilet paper. He's so silly, he doesn't know that I can't use those tiny pieces and I definitely can't reach them from the toilet since he spreads it all over the house. I don't have the heart to tell him I just keep throwing it out.

Hockey is still fun, they play a game with me where I have to guess where they're going to shoot by pointing with my glove. They try hard but mostly they aim at the middle of the net, lucky for me I am usually standing there and it just hits me in the... well you know. Those guys are getting better though sometimes I point at my head and they get me right in the forehead!

Single life is okay and I'm not sure if I'm ready to start dating yet. Crazy Charlie from the laundromat says he'll set me up with his sister, he told me she's the "sweetest piece of ass this side of Lambton", but I guess he's joking, he loves her very much, he's always trying to hug and kiss her.

Anyways, I should get started on supper. Last night I was microwaving a potato and fell asleep right beside it on the bed. Good thing the dryer buzzer went off at the foot of the bed or I might have missed supper!

Love,
JIM