She sure is adorable.
Yesterday I went to pick up the little angel to discover that her and her cousins decided to play “Extreme Makeover” on each other. By the time I arrived they had only had time to focus on the coiffe.
Julie looks like something from the Jerry Springer show. The front of her head is clearly visible from all angles, which serves as a window into facial expressions I have never seen before, like the “my mommy is sooooooo pissed at me” puppy dog eyes look. Or the eyeball roll when she receives punishment for the crime.
Yup, I gots me a reg’lar little trailer bunny down ‘ere. The worst part is how Mommy is taking it. She was in another dimension for a while last night obviously preoccupied with the new look Julie. I’m thinking I need to take some of the heat off the poor kid.
I decided to make my lady look like the outsider and make her happy she has nice flowing curly ,locks and a fashion sense.
I’m going to take one of my tight under shirts and cut it just above my navel. I’m going to shave my head entirely except for a little curly tail in the back. I’m going to wear sweat pants that resemble a Hawaiian and techno-mess pattern. I’ll pick up a bottle of Brut after shave and smear it all over. For the kicker I’ll drink whiskey from the bottle, gnaw on beef jerky, yell at the television and smack Sue in the ass every time she walks within arm’s length… Hell I might even teach Julie to shotgun a beer!
Who’s the outsider now?
3 comments:
I'm moving North...
Sue
Well darling, I'm not sure the mullet would make an easy transition for the scamp up North. She would almost be certain to fall in with the "NASCAR crowd" wind up pregnant at 13 with a dude named Billy Bob who operates a forklift at a factory.
You had best stay put.
So, in other words...it's going to be "business as usual" for you? ;)
Yeah...I had to say it.
Hope you have a great 2007!
And she is awfully cute, btw. :)
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